say no to the spiritual rat race

For many individuals, spirituality is a way of bettering themselves.

But for many more, the intention of ‘bettering one-self’ becomes an addiction.

And just like any addiction, when living it, you often become immune to it.

It’s difficult for you to see while in it, but take one step out and it’ll become so clear that you can’t even fathom how you missed it to begin with. Something has happened to the spiritual and personal development community in the last few years. It’s become consumed with millennial idiosyncrasies and individuals who crave a life of freedom but have yet to embark on their own personal journey of transformation and yet attempting to teach the masses what they ‘know’.

It’s become a well of fuckery to say the least.

Individuals who are mid to late twenties are labeling themselves experts and proclaiming they can ‘heal’ you with their unique and special gifts. But these same individuals haven’t even gotten to know themselves yet.

Know when you get to know yourself? IN your twenties. That decade is for growth but how can someone whose eyes have yet to open to their own growth embark on helping others grow?

They can’t.

And that’s why I’m here writing this.

It needs to be said and it needs to be said out loud.

Now first off, the journey of personal development never ends. It’s on-going however there are turning points. There are moments where you have lived enough and experienced enough to share the aha’s you’ve had. But then there are spots where you must be with yourself in your mess and grow.

By no means am I saying that ‘anyone’ in their twenties have not lived enough.

What I am saying is there’s a difference between listening to people who know and listening to people who are trying to know.

Those who know aren’t trying to prove a thing. They have nothing to prove. They know what they know and they’ve lived it, breathed it and experienced it not once but twice or more to be able to share and perhaps even teach it.

Those who don’t yet know but are attempting to know do so through the effort of proving themselves.

You’ll find those individuals bragging and unable to humble themselves. They place themselves on pedestals acting as if what they ‘have’ makes them better than the rest.

A true healer at heart has all the ‘stuff’ but you won’t often hear them talking about it because there’s more to life than that.

An unhealed healer will elevate themselves to a self-proclaimed celebrity status in an attempt to feel better about what they’re lacking inside of themselves. They’ll also shout there is no such thing as humility and ‘you should be able to celebrate yourself’ however having worked in the entertainment and fashion industries, around actual wealth and celebrity I can attest to the fact that those who have it, don’t flaunt it because they know what they have.

They don’t feel they need to prove themselves. Not in their words, actions, energy, presence or with their physical stuff.

Every celebrity I’ve ever been around or worked with were kind, generous and never once felt a need to brag about what they have or have done in their lives. They were normal people who perhaps were carrying around pockets of cash but were not flaunting a single thing about themselves.

As a matter a fact I recall a photo-shoot I worked on where I met a supermodel with whom I didn’t even know was the actual model when she walked through the door at the time. She was barefaced and fresh in sneakers, jeans and a t-shirt. She was sweet and looked like my peer and it wasn’t until she sat down in the makeup chair that I realized she was the reason we were there. During the shoot itself as I stepped in to adjust her outfit, she carried a full conversation with me about my late grandmother that to this day I’ll never forget.

She treated me as if I mattered even if by social or financial status the evidence could support otherwise in that particular moment. She spoke with me not down or at me and it’s those actions that build respect.

I had previously worked in wardrobe and styling for those who are new to me and my life journey and once during a music video shoot for a well-known band, I remember just how chill they all were with those of us they could easily have looked at as ‘the help’ or ‘nobodies’.

Never once in my careers in any industry I’ve been in have a met someone full of wealth and status who outwardly elevated themselves as if they were better than the rest. It was their pure embodiment and humility that had people naturally celebrating them and their talents and I think with that you now understand my point.

The distinction above is important to note in selecting someone you’d like to learn and grow from.

Because individuals still deep in their own mess may be good at one thing and that’s bragging about themselves but they’ll struggle to go deeper or give you much more beneath the surface because they’re living with the mentality that it’s not who you are, it’s what you have.

And we can guess how that’ll evolve.”What God giveth, God taketh away” because those who know, know that it’s not what you materialistically/physically have, it’s who you are on the inside.

I call these individuals ‘unhealed healers’ which is my own sweet name for them however I’m sure this isn’t the first time it’s been mentioned, not by me or blanketly the interwebs.

Unhealed healers are chasing the ‘stuff’ and they’ve ultimately put a lot of people in precarious positions themselves due to the fact that they live with the mentality that, “You can have and do this too!”

Yet it’s that mentality that empowers people to quit their 9-5’s without any savings or income to afford next months rent or groceries.

What I am telling you is these unhealed healers hurt more than they help.

They lead individuals astray and those individuals usually end up to me to then be lead and guided the ‘right’ way. The ‘healed’ way which was the way they were seeking all along. They were seeking someone who had a gift, not someone tossing pennies into a well and hoping to hit it big.

So why share this with you? What’s the bigger, universal purpose this blog may be serving?

To educate and awaken you to what is or could be happening in or around you.

You see a lot of individuals who end up working with me tell me horror stories about a ‘coach’ who ‘forced their services on me’ and ‘because they knew my pain points Amy, they knew what would trigger me so they pressured and harassed me and because I looked up to them I felt like I had to say yes and trust them.’

Misusing and managing your power, status and platform to receive money or ‘hit a goal’ are things these unhealed healers do.

They also get triggered by the things you desire to do.

If your healer of any kind, coach, adviser, psychic, astrologer is not calm, centered and grounded on the inside, you’ll feel it as you sit before them. If they tell you to just throw it on a credit card immediately and hurry up and sign up or demand a specific commitment from you while deterring you aware from what you feel guided to, they aren’t serving you.

If they tell you that you need or should buy something they’re offering just because you previously have bought from them, run in the opposite direction.

I’m a firm believer in the law of attraction for all you who are wondering but I’m also old school in my religious and spiritual beliefs that your negative energy can and will attract negative forces and at times that negative energy inside you is coming from places, people and situations you aren’t even aware of. Which is ultimately a very similar belief system but I also believe that sometimes, for some things it takes more than just ‘thinking positive’ to remove things.

It takes being educated and awakened to an understanding with someone you trust who knows, and a lot of people shy away from taking that approach because they fear they’ll be perceived as passive aggressive or negative in their platform.

If you don’t know how things aren’t serving you then you’ll make blind decisions being lead from your own inner wounds therefore if someone’s gotta do it, I’m probably the best person for it since my life experience and client cases provide some of the heaviest things a human can go through. We aren’t just manifesting new homes and cars around here as my cases range from physical abuse, stalking, harassment, suicide, divorce, addiction, infidelity and must I even continue?

Let me leave you with this – if you feel in a hurry to get the things, the external things you so badly desire and feel you need, quit on that rat race immediately.

Let me save you years or more of disappointment, frustration, money and heartache.

Do not fall into the trap of investing and hiring people who feed those unhealed needs. The need you have is more than a material thing – it’s an emotional thing that must be seen, heard, felt and loved unconditionally.